In fact, you may have been trying to avoid it at all costs because it’s so painful.īut here we take a different approach by befriending your experience. You might be very used to feeling shame, but you may not know it well. Find them, then stay with feeling them for a while. Bring your attention inside, and touch into the qualities of curiosity, wonder, openness, and compassion that are natural to who you are. Practice: Set the stage for your exploration of shame. Just like the ancient adventurers who took to the sea not knowing what they would find, be courageous, curious, and open.Īnd when it comes to pain, discover the most compassionate place within you to receive it. If you’re just beginning to explore shame, you’re going into foreign territory. How? Here are 10 potentially life-changing ways to move through shame. Or you can befriend, explore, and welcome it into the light of conscious awareness. You can make the choice to let your pain rule you by keeping it in the shadows.

Almost like being born anew, you are open, light, and available to life. The boundaries that disconnect you from everyone and everything begin to fall away. You move from feeling oh, so separate and alienated to being more at ease with yourself and your own experience. If you explore it skillfully, if you navigate shame with wisdom and heart, you find tenderness, compassion, courageous vulnerability, and the relief that comes from no longer hiding from yourself-or keeping yourself hidden from others and the world. You think that all that will do is highlight your worst fears about yourself.īut here’s the possibility for you-the light that can begin to untangle shame: It’s the secret emotion that can sit in you like a poison.Īnd the last thing you want to do is bring it out in the open. Shame is so personal! It’s a painful feeling of humiliation-that you’ve done something wrong or that there’s something disgraceful or embarrassing about you. How? It’s behind the self-critical voice in your head, many unsatisfying dynamics in relationships, feelings of lack and unworthiness, and choices that keep you from fully living. If shame stays where it is, unseen and unexplored, it will continue to affect you. You think that if you leave it hidden in the shadows, outside of conscious awareness, maybe, just maybe, you can pretend it’s not there.īut it is.

So uncomfortable that you may not even want to read this post. “Shame derives its power from being unspeakable.”

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